It's not a circle it's a star.

I am making big changes in my life. This no longer feels like a choice or an option, but absolutely the thing to do. I am scared. I am nervous but I am excited and I can't wait. I want to see how it all pans out. The other side of this is these changes have been prompted by several causes. I have had three very difficult years at a personal level and as this time has passed it has been increasingly clear to me who supports me when I need it and frankly who doesn't. The people who are in my life who give to me as much as I give to them, the people who give me more and the ones I give more to. Most of the time I am incredibly supportive of others and try to be there for everyone as much as possible however, at times, when I wobble,  I just cant and at those times it always becomes very clear to me who it is who really supports me. Its often not who I expect nor how I expect. To those of you that do I am eternally grateful. Thank you.

I think we all struggle with this, and as we get older it becomes clearer that we look for quality not quantity in the relationships we have. There seems to be a misconception that friendships should always be equal. Sadly this isn't the case, some friendships (like the animals in Orwell's animal farm) are more equal than others. Of course the beauty of all relationships is that they are dynamic: at one time one of us gives a little more; at another time the other does. But we all know someone, who no matter what, it always comes back to them. I feel for these people I really do, and I am very aware that with some of you I do it myself. Kate, you are my beacon of hope. Always. It is something I have struggled with understanding until another fabulous friend of mine explained "its not a circle, its a star but at the end of the day it balances out". Some people will give you more, others you will give more to, but at the end of the day it evens out and effectively you are just paying it forward.

I was going to post more, but actually I like this thought to end on. Everyone shining like stars. So cheesy but kinda nice.

My yoga teacher posted something lovely today, and it seems appropriate here, for everyone I can be sure of.

Piglet sidled up to Pooh. "Pooh" he whispered. "Yes, Piglet?" "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."”